I often go into Lent wanting it to be a deep, spiritual experience. Sometimes it is. This year, it wasn’t; and that’s okay. This year was hugely interrupted by an international trip, during which most of my Lenten fasts were set aside, and my habits of spiritual discipline (and exercise) were thrown to the wind. But that’s part life when travelling. Then we came back just in time for Holy Week, sick and jet lagged, and work exploded. I’ve had two 13+ hour days this week! So I’m still exhausted and I’m far away from feeling any spiritual depth around this Easter.
But through all this it’s a deep comfort to know that Christ came to pursue us, not to be pursued. He doesn’t mind if we are tired, frustrated, and just not in the mood. He loves us, and just wants us to show up and let him do the work for our salvation.
So tonight, i’m just going to show up at Good Friday Mass. I’m not going to worry about my hair or make up, or the fact that i’m kind of grumpy, or that I haven’t said a Rosary (or don’t any serious prayer or quiet time) in three weeks, or that I failed at all of my Lenten fasting. I’m just going to come as I am, burdened and heavy laden, mourn my Savior, and rest in his love.
Because really, that’s all he asks of us.
And, of course, I have to share again my Good Friday Lament.